Month: October 2009

To Declare Him

If you’ve read my previous posts, you know about the recent getaway I took part in. I’d like to give some more details about the weekend, specifically how this blogspot came to be.

Since the very beginning of my consciousness, as long as I can remember, I’ve wanted to be “a writer”. I’ve tried my hand at poetry (which I cannot write and do not enjoy writing), fiction, and nonfiction. I’ve never had the courage to do anything with what I’ve written, but I have boxes full of paper.

Before going on this trip, I had been feeling a desire to write again. The desire often comes and goes, wavering with my moods. Yet my primary question was and has been for a while, “Do I have anything worth writing about?” I often think of the verse in Ecclesiastes that says there is nothing new under heaven. There are SO many books and authors and written words that I wonder if it is presumptuous and arrogant of me to think I have something new or profound or meaningful to say. So, I haven’t been writing much.

A lady on this trip started our Saturday morning by bringing up an online newspaper she subscribes to that has a devotional corner. She mentioned that she would send me the link because she knew I liked to write and she thought I might be interested in checking out this website to submit a devotional. While I had not intended on speaking with God about my writing, or even spending any time thinking about it, she planted the seed in my head.

As part of our prayer time, we were to go off by ourselves for some solo prayer and see what happened. Our pastor (who wrote the curriculum for the weekend) had given us suggestions of things to pray about/for as a help to keep our focus. Being a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to answering questions (it’s the teacher/student in me), I attempted to pray for everything on the list and tried to receive answers for every question.

Then here came this: pray that God’s plan for you will be your plans for you. Ask Him what His plans are for you. So I did. My exact prayer was: “Do I have anything worth saying? anything that hasn’t already been said?” I reclined on the rock beside the water, hoping for God’s audible voice, hoping for an answer. I waited. I waited.

Nothing happened. So I sat back up and moved to the next section of the book, which was to read Isaiah 40. Immediately I got chill bumps. I had a hard time reading the passage out loud because I was crying with joy. God answered my question. Through His breathing, living Word, this was His answer:

1″‘Comfort, comfort my people,’ says your God. 2’Speak tenderly to Jerusalem. Tell her that her sad days are gone and her sins are pardoned. Yes, the LORD has punished her twice over for all her sins.’ 3Listen! It’s the voice of someone shouting, ‘Clear the way through the wilderness for the LORD! Make a straight highway through the wasteland for our God! 4Fill in the valleys, and level the mountains and hills. Straighten the curves and smooth out the rough places. 5Then the glory of the LORD will be revealed, and all people will see it together. The LORD has spoken.’ 6A voice said, ‘Shout!’ I asked, ‘What should I shout?’ ‘Shout that people are like the grass. Their beauty fades as quickly as the flowers in a field. 7 The grass withers and the flowers fade beneath the breath of the LORD. And so it is with people. 8 The grass withers and the flowers fade, but the Word of our God stands forever.’ 9O Zion, messenger of good news, shout it from the mountaintops! Shout it louder, O Jerusalem. Shout, and do not be afraid. Tell the towns of Judah, ‘Your God is coming!’ 10Yes, the Sovereign LORD is coming in power. He will rule with a powerful arm. See, He brings His reward with Him as He comes. He will feed His flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in His arms, holding them close to His heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young.'”

I had my answer. Yes, I know enough about Isaiah to know that this is a book of prophecy. If my mind is remembering correctly, this particular passage is referring to John the Baptist declaring Jesus. And while a book of prophecy is not necessarily completely applicable to me all the time, I couldn’t help but notice that it did directly answer my question. “What should I shout?”

I am to declare Him – but specifically, I am to declare His comfort, His reality, His coming, and His care.

So now I’m on a quest. If I’m supposed to be declaring Him and four of His aspects, I better know Him and those four of His aspects. So, I’m searching. I’m learning. I’m thirsting. I’m growing. I’m changing.

And I just declared Him to you. Enjoy!

Spiritual Dimensions Weekend

I was able to attend a Spiritual Dimensions Retreat this last weekend. A group of 12 adults spent 2 days and 2 nights at Western Hills Lodge in Sequoyah State Park.

As in the situation mentioned in my Darkforce post, there was opposition from spiritual forces around me to prevent me from going to the retreat. I did not cave, however, and did attend (with the help of some strong medicines).

Before I went, I mentioned to my husband that it had better be a great weekend because of all the pain I was enduring as Darkforce tried to deter me.

It was a phenomenal weekend. Speaking of it on Sunday with my father-in-law brought tears to my eyes; thinking of it on my way to work – trying to keep it fresh and real – brings tears to my eyes.

Did you know that God will show up, if you position yourself in such a way as to see and hear Him? Have you recently experienced His still small voice (audible or inaudible) or His Word breathing with life as you quench your thirst or “a peace that passes all understanding”? Have you “asked, sought, knocked”, and “received, found, and entered”?

Because of my amazing and awesome God, Who is never taken by surprise, Who will never leave me or forsake me, Who gives good gifts to His children, I have the amazing privilege of saying, “Yes, my God has shown up for me recently.”

For the sake of time, let me give a brief synopsis: during structured prayer time, I realized I live in fear ~ which means I’m not trusting my God; during solo prayer time, I asked a specific question and, through His living Word, I received a specific answer; when doubt of that answer reared his ugly head, the scheduled Bible reading for that evening confirmed that I had heard my answer correctly.

It leaves me speechless (audibly at least). It leaves my heart singing:

Amazing love, how can it be, that You my King would die me?
Amazing love, I know it’s true, and it’s my joy to honor You.
In all I do, let me honor You.

I’m forgiven because You were forsaken,
I’m accepted, You were condemned.
I am alive and well, Your spirit is within me,
Because You died and rose again.
by Chris Tomlin

and

Empty Hands held high
Such Small sacrifice
If not joined with my life
I sing in vain tonight

May the words I say
And the things I do
Make my lifesong sing
Bring a smile to you
Let my lifesong sing to You
Let my lifesong sing to You
I want to sign your name
to the end of this day
Knowing that my heart was true
Let my lifesong sing to You

LORD, I give my life
A Living sacrifice
To reach a world in need
To be your hands and feet
by Casting Crowns

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